MacKenzie Speaks: Fifteen Years, Nine Months

Hi. I’m MacKenzie.

What is making all of that noise? I didn’t know birds came that big!

This has been a terrible week for me. Sunday night I had some type of terrible accident with my jaw: it got stuck, it hurts, and I couldn’t swallow right! The Mother of Cats did everything that she could and was putting me into the cat carrier to go to the emergency room when I finally got things under control and we stayed home for the night instead.

But she called the vet the next day and made a few suspicious trips out in the car during the day.

Wednesday morning a whole flock of crows (The Mother of Cats said it was a murder of crows. Right. That’s what I would like to have done to some of them…) descended on the trees in the yard and made lots of racket. Crazy. What is up with the crows? I was so busy watching them through the window I didn’t really fight when the Mother of Cats slipped a pill down my throat, and then missed that the Mother of Cats had gotten the cat carrier in from the garage.


I think that the crows were trying to warn me. She put me in the car and took me to the vet’s office!

The Mother of Cats, the vet, and the vet technician all ganged up on me to take blood out of both of my legs. Unbelievable!!! I was assaulted by a pack of uncaring women who were dismissive of my needs!!! Why would the Mother of Cats allow this?

The Mother of Cats finally brought me home but as soon as we got there she gave me icky medicine that she squirted into my mouth!! NOOO!!!! My jaw hurts, why would she do something like this!!!

Oh, wait. I feel better now.

Time to nap.

This has been the worst day ever! I’ll just take a little rest on my blankie. 

Yesterday the Mother of Cats left me AGAIN and came back with even more pills and medicine to stuff into my mouth. My jaw hurts!! Why is this happening. She even followed me to the cat box and took samples of my private business to take to the vet. The Mother of Cats is really acting strangely!!

The worst thing is, she says that I can’t have any more cookies. From now on I have to eat soft baby food from a can. What is going on here!!!

I do have to say that my jaw feels better and that I was able to eat most of my breakfast this morning.

I’m such a good boy.

Can I have some tuna flakes instead of cookies?


Notes from the Mother of Cat:
  • Yep. I drugged MacKenzie up with a sedative to take him to the vet.
  • I was absolutely shocked to see his age on the check-in sheet at the vet’s office. Fifteen years, nine months. How did the years go by so quickly?
  • MacKenzie has kitty TMJ and his jaw literally got stuck open while crunching his cookies. It was pretty horrible at the time; drooling, bewildered stare at me, pawing at his cheek with his tongue working like crazy to fix the problem, and then getting more frantic.  The vet showed me how to massage his jaw to release it if this happens again and I’m being really careful about what he gets to eat. Right now he is on pain killers and an anti-inflammatory drug to get him over this current episode.
  • I have TMJ myself (thank you, scleroderma!) and was placed on jaw rest for months while I recovered, and as it turns out that this is what we are going to do with MacKenzie. No more crunchies for him!! His dry food is very tiny so we will continue it and he also gets wet food twice a day. He isn’t a fan of wet food, but he is trying.
  • The problem can be corrected with surgery, but because of his age and hatred strong dislike of medical personnel we won’t be doing that.
  • The blood work shows that my geriatric cat has hyperthyroidism and will need to start meds for that. Oh, boy. As it turns out, cats with hyperthyroidism are basically assholes jerks, and MacKenzie’s personality should mellow out some once he is on drugs.
  • “He’s a jerk?” you ask. Sadly, he is. He greats people at the door and rubs on their legs, but then bites without warning if they try to pet him. He scratched my grandson, and plasters himself onto the only member of the family who is allergic to him. He yowls to be let out into the garage at 3am and scratches the door jam like a dog to make sure I come. Lord help me if I forget his cookies! A jerk. But he loves me, and life would be really hard without him.
  • Today I’m going to hunt for some soft treat that might work for him. There must be tuna flakes or some nice salmon out there that would tempt him. He totally turned his nose up at the soft cat treats. What a strong willed kitty.
  • He has to go back for another blood draw next month. The vet told me to double up on the sedative next time…